The Representative

MissCin: Doesn't it always seem like when you first meet someone.. you aren't meeting them..  you are actually meeting their representative?"

Me: *nodds* Yea...its like a sales pitch huh? Or even an interview..

..

I walked passed the lot on my way to work and stopped to look in at an attractive display that caught my eye..

The Representative walked up to me with a perfect Crest smile and deep dimples and said "Is there anything I can help you with?"

I wanted to say I was just looking and walk off but the display was quite appealing... "Ummm... can you tell me about this model?"

The Representative stepped back a little, winked and said "Well, tell me what you are looking for Miss and I'm sure I will be able to help you with something..."

So I thought to myself.. *shurgz* why not ..."Well I'm interested in a woman with ambition, someone I can build an dynasty with... good work ethic and great at money managing. Oh and of course attractive... loyal.. appreciative, mmm... she has to be a little cocky... hmm a little dominate but respectful with it... and amazing at a good mindfuk"

The Representative tilted her head and smiled and said "You're in luck, I have exactly what you are looking for plus more... She is a hardworking, very ambitious, loyal, honest, cocky, a beast in the bedroom, bilingual, attentive, comes with a full tank of act-right, hasn't been owned in over a year and she is fully versed in the art of mindfuking"

I thought to myself, looked the relationship model up and down, walked around her a little and even if her shoes were clean.. and even though the deal seemed to good to be true I simply said "I'll take her."

I took my newly found treasure, folded up my receipt and put it in my wallet..

I have to admit enjoyed the ride.. and it was smooth at first... I did enjoy her.. and I tried for the most part.. but in the end it seemed everything seems just keep breaking down... the loyalty was sticky, only worked sometimes.. her cocky was turn up way too high and always needed an adjustment and the ego well.. it was always acting up.. but the biggest issue was that I couldnt like keep her tank full of act right for nothing! It was ALWAYS running low.. I mean.. how many months was I supposed to get on that full tank anyway?!

 But you know... unfortunately I did not read my receipt completely... with my purchase I forgot to go over the fine print .. and of course the representative didn't remind me...

As I thought over my return of the relationship model and all of the emotions wasted on her.. I decided to look over the fine print in the receipt.. and not to my surprise it read...

::

For the first 30 days the Representative may twist, stretch or bend the truth to get a "sell". The misrepresentation of the relationship model is the job of the Representative and it is the buyers responsibility to recognize it as bullshit. The relationship model is not guaranteed to last through the interview process. Model may have been used, abused, harbor negative emotions, have trust issues and/or the heart may still belong to another. It is not guaranteed that anything the representative said is actually truth. 

All emotions and time spent is Final. 

In other words...Buyer Beware

::

*shurgz* 

I kinda had to laugh to myself... I knew better ...

*sighz*

Moral: Never trust the Representative...